The Tomcat Blog: Obamanation faces Obamageddon

This is it, the moment of truth… We find ourselves standing once again on the edge of the cliff (and so soon. Weren’t we just here a few short weeks back?) Anyway, Obama’s sequestration apocalypse looms before us. Despite O’s warnings, we may have to endure the horrors of the massive 2.4% reduction in the GROWTH of Federal spending. Think about it, departments in the Federal Government are screaming because they may have to do the same thing this year as they did last year with more money than they had last year but they want even more money. Obama’s lips are moving so you know the words “More Revenues” are going to dribble out… again… and again. He’s back on the corporate jet kick, so I crunched the government estimate numbers to see what a years’ worth of Corporate Jet taxes would cover vs. spending. I can see why he’s after such a lucrative target, the revenue brought in by closing the loophole will cover almost 9 seconds of government spending. We’re talking making a big dent in the debt there buddy… What about the other 31,535,991 seconds of spending in the year?

The “Never Let a Crisis go to Waste” Road Show has been putting in the overtime and racking up the frequent Liar… I mean Flyer miles. O has stood in front of police, firefighters, EMS, and teachers warning they will all lose their jobs (I wonder, what do my state and local taxes get spent on), he's gone to the Newport shipyard spouting the same message to the workers there. Not only has O been pounding the pavement, his minions have been screaming the same dire warning in front of any camera they can find. Janet Napolitano announced that “Illegal aliens in immigration detention facilities have already been released in advance of potential budget cuts…” bear with me here, the department is still funded as normal but criminals are being released??? Let’s say the budget cuts don’t happen, what is ICE going to do then, send letters out to the criminals telling them “Come back, We Fucked-UP…” (IDIOTS). ICE is funded to house 34,000 detainees, on average they have approximately 30,000 to 31,000 detainees lodged in detention facilities at $125 per person per day… I’m thinking the tax paying public is due a rebate for work not performed (3,500 X $125 X 365 = $159,687,500). Where did that cash go? Still just another minute and 15 seconds of government spending… (Again, IDIOTS).

The danger is so ominous that the funds for departments and agencies that don’t even exist are in jeopardy of being cut. Obama warned the $20 Million budget for the National Drug Intelligence Center may lose as much as $2 Million. The National Drug Intelligence Center doesn’t exist anymore it closed in June 2012, (I think they can do without the whole $20 million). Now he’s just pulling stuff out of his A$$.

Me being the Mr. Helper that I am, I looked into some of the pitfalls that await us if the sequester (or) Obamageddon kicks in.

Obamageddon… Pythons will overrun New Hampshire, eating dogs, cats and small children. (Pythons really like March snow).

Obamageddon… Peace loving Islamic Jihadist will be flying long range bombers over all major U.S. cities.

Obamageddon… Mississippi River will flow backwards flooding the entire state of Illinois. (We’ll miss you).

Obamageddon… We’ll all have to take 2^nd jobs feeding sick children to old people. (I don’t like being around sick children, all that whining and runny nose stuff).

Obamageddon… California will slip off into the ocean. (Been promising us that for years… still waiting).

Obamageddon… All airline pilots will suddenly forget how to fly and crash. (2,000+ flights under my belt… I’ll just stay on the ground and dodge’em as they tumble from the sky).

Obamageddon… (Speaking of airlines) Airport TSA lines will be so slow passengers should bring caskets, they will most likely die of old age while waiting. (Maybe they should put in express lanes manned by “Hijack Free Zone” signs… according to liberals “Gun Free Zone signs really work”).

Obamageddon… Ships will no longer be able to float on water.

Obamageddon… Gasoline will skyrocket to $4 or more a gallon (Ooop’s that already happened).

Obamageddon… Gravity will shut off in Wyoming and everybody will fly off into space. (What is that, seventeen people?)

Obamageddon… Mars will shift its orbit blocking out the Sun over the U.S.

Finally the horror of all horrors, Obamageddon…MOOchelle will be limited to twelve White House bakery pies… a day… She’ll make us all pay for that!

OK, I let my inner smart-a** out for a bit but really folks, its 2.4%, that’s a rounding error for the Government. How much did we all lose in our take-home pay after Jan. 1^st, how much has the jump in gasoline prices pulled from our own budgets? Myself, it’s an 8% plus hit on my bottom line, if politicians were serious about getting a handle on our financial problems that would be a good target for them to shoot for. Any pain felt from the sequester (Obamageddon) is going to be deliberately inflicted for political purposes so the growth and spending can continue.

The likely effect is nothing really changes, Monday the sun rises for another day, we get up, we go to work, we come home, and the sun sets. Government agencies and programs swallow more money, we hear of more waste, all the while listening to the constant drone of the calls for more revenue and “fair share”
For now I think I’ll fire up the grill, pop a cold one and watch the “Obamanation” crumble under the strain of the 2.4% cut in GROWTH… or I’ll just go to work… I haven’t decided yet. Either way we better rest-up for the next weekly crises.